“What do you think—” Ryan and I both started the sentence at the same time, chuckling as our words trailed off.
Ryan sighed and turned so his back was leaning against the arm of the couch. “Let me guess—What do you think about Dare’s idea?”
It was my turn to sigh. Leaning back against the couch, I ignored the television that was playing sports highlights and stared up at the ceiling. If I widened my legs a little bit more and let my arms stretch out closer to Ryan on the couch, I tried not to overthink it. “Yeah.”
Ryan didn’t seem surprised when my response stopped there. He just shifted so that one leg moved closer to my thigh and nodded. “Me too.”
If Dare could have seen us, he would’ve smiled. I was glad he thought our awkwardness was cute, but sometimes, I wasn’t sure how to move past it. Still, I tried. “He seemed excited.”
There was a silent acknowledgment that we both liked pleasing him, but Dare was very firm that we wouldn’t do anything unless we were all into it. Which put us in a holding pattern because Ryan and I weren’t sure what we wanted.
Talking about it had to be a good first step.
Ryan nodded. “Yeah, he made it sound…interesting.”
That had me chuckling, and he gave a shrug. “What? Do you have a better description?”
Deciding to be honest, I nodded. “Hot.”
Dare had originally mentioned the idea of going out to a bar that was a bit kinky in passing, but it’d been easy to see the idea turned him on. He knew of a place in one of the rough sections of town we’d never been to, but he said it was one of his favorite places to go.
It hadn’t taken much prodding to get him to explain why.
Evidently, they were a dirty group who didn’t mind extreme public displays of affection. When Dare had mentioned hearing one of the servers orgasm as his Master had fucked him in the back room, Ryan and I had both shifted nervously in our seats.
Dare had just grinned, knowing how turned on the idea made us. He made it clear he wasn’t expecting us to go that far, but I had a pretty good idea that feeling us up in public and teasing us would be a huge turn-on for him.
When Dare had stretched himself out across our laps the first night we met him, it should have clued us in that he didn’t mind others watching. I couldn’t decide how it made me feel. I liked the idea of making Dare happy. I loved the idea that he’d wiggle all over me and grope me.
I just wasn’t sure about the public setting—well, not exactly public. But still…
“We should probably ask for more details before we say yes.” Ryan’s leg inched closer to mine.
“But you want to say yes?” I was pretty sure we were on the same page, but I wanted to hear the words.
“Yeah…but…” Ryan shifted, slowly stretching his foot out across my lap and leaning into the back of the couch.
Yes, the idea was hot as hell, but I had a feeling it wouldn’t be like any date I’d ever been on. Not that it was a bad thing. I liked that things with Dare were different. I liked how my life had changed over the past couple of weeks since we’d met him.
Before, Ryan would have never stretched his legs out over me, and he would have never moved his hands to start absently caressing down the back of my neck. Until Dare had made us see what was right in front of our faces, there had always been a wall between us. I loved that the wall was finally starting to crumble, and we were finally really seeing each other.
“He’s not going to push us.” We both knew that, but having the reminder out there took some of the stress out of the room. It didn’t make figuring out what to do any easier, though.
“Do you think it’s true? I mean, that the server gets felt up by his Master in front of everybody?” Even if Ryan had managed to hide the curiosity in his voice better, the thin sweatpants he was wearing wouldn’t have hidden his arousal.
Not that I was deliberately looking at his dick. It was just…noticeable.
What turned him on about it? Watching the server get teased? The idea that Dare might do something like that to him? Watching Dare do that to me? If the questions had been reversed, I wasn’t sure I would have been able to pick just one. It was like a dessert, and every time I peeled back another layer, something even more delicious was hiding underneath.
All the pieces worked together, and all the layers made it even tastier.
“Dare’s always honest.” He might downplay something to try not to make us nervous, but he wouldn’t lie. “He sat on your lap at the club. What else do you think he’d…”
My words trailed off as images started flooding through my brain. I wasn’t sure what I was asking, but I had a feeling we’d just seen the tip of the iceberg when it came to what Dare was comfortable with in public.
Ryan’s fingers stilled, and he shrugged. “Lots.”
I had to fight the shiver that wanted to race up my spine. I wasn’t sure if it was the images in my head or Ryan’s touch or the heat in his voice, but suddenly I was achingly hard. “Yeah, that’s what I thought.”
“If everybody else is…you know…like that, then we wouldn’t have to worry about people saying something later if they saw us in public.” I couldn’t decide if Ryan was talking himself into it or just pointing out information.
I shifted my head just enough to encourage his fingers to start moving again. “True.”
Not that we’d talked about what we would say to people in public, but Ryan was right. If everybody else in the bar were borderline exhibitionists, or just liked watching, then we probably didn’t have anything to worry about. They wouldn’t want to be outed any more than we would.
I wasn’t going to worry about that part anytime soon, however. I’d never seen anyone from work at the gay bars and clubs we’d been to, and if we saw them someplace weird, then that meant they were into something kinky too. Before I could figure out what else to say, Ryan spoke again. “Is it ridiculous that I think it would be easier if Dare just made the decision and said we would go?”
“No. I think that’s kind of what having a Dom is for. To make the hard decisions.” And to read your mind so you didn’t have to ask for things like spankings and being tied to the bed.
That must have made Ryan feel more confident because his touch slowly turned from casual to something with more intent. More assured, maybe.
I just wasn’t sure where it was going. Not that I was planning on asking him. We were still in the awkward phase of a relationship where we were trying to work everything out. I always hated that part. Most relationships never really got off the ground for me, so we’d always been stuck in the weird phase.
But the few that had lasted were nice once we’d gotten past it.
I liked knowing people’s expectations. Could I lean over and kiss him whenever I wanted to? How did he like to be touched? When did he like to be touched? Could I curl up next to him if he was watching TV on the couch? I had so many questions but not enough answers—and not enough confidence to ask any of them.
“Me too.” It took me a moment to figure out what Ryan was responding to.
“Do you think we need to tell him that?” If Dare wanted us to make a decision about the bar, would it be reasonable to put the ball back in his court and let him decide?
Ryan’s finger trailed down my neck and started caressing lower toward my chest. “Can we do that? I mean, can we just tell him to decide?”
I shrugged. It made sense to me, but… “I don’t know.”
Ryan kept up the slow touches, but I could almost hear the wheels in his brain turning. “He said he wants to talk about rules and expectations. That can be one of our rules. He gets to decide on the hard stuff unless we safeword.”
The whole conversation was weird, but the idea that we could make Dare figure all this out and let him lead the way took a lot of the stress off my shoulders. “Yes.”
Ryan chuckled and shifted like he was leaning closer for a moment before he relaxed back. “Okay. We’ll figure out a way to tell him. Eventually.”
Had he been leaning in to kiss me?
Dare had made it very clear that an appropriate good morning greeting was required. That made it easy to wrap my arms around Ryan and kiss him first thing. It was everything after that where we were floundering.
Could I just tell him that I wanted to kiss? Would that look needy? Weird? What if he hadn’t been thinking about it and I just said something completely out of the blue?
“Eventually.” Maybe I’d text him later.
Texting was easy because there was no one looking at me, and if I took ten minutes to rearrange the words into something reasonable, he didn’t seem to mind. I was doing better about just sending off the words that were in my head without overthinking it, though.
I’d done so well the other night when Dare had been asking what I’d thought about our first real night together, he’d said I deserved a reward. But he’d been very cagey about what he meant.
Ryan must have had a lot going through his head, or maybe he was just horny and distracted, because he didn’t let the subject drop. “You like that idea? I mean, letting Dare decide things.”
Not really sure where the conversation was going, I nodded. “Yes.”
I knew Ryan wouldn’t judge no matter what I wanted from Dare, but it was still hard to give myself permission to unload everything that was in my head. Ryan didn’t seem to mind, however. He nodded as well. “I do too.”
I shouldn’t have been surprised when he continued, but I hadn’t been expecting the way he’d eased right into talking about some things. “I like not having to guess how to please him or what to do. I know that’s oversimplifying things, but it’s nice.”
I understood what he meant. When Dare was in charge, all I had to do was follow instructions and that made everyone happy. It was…liberating. “It feels good when you don’t have to worry.”
I found myself leaning into his touch, and I wasn’t sure what to do. Well, that wasn’t entirely honest. I knew what I wanted, just not how to respond. Ryan either didn’t mind or didn’t notice because he just kept talking as he caressed back up my neck. “Do you think it would feel better if we had to worry less?”
My expression must have shown him how confused I was because he chuckled. “Okay, let me try that again.”
He paused for a moment, clearly rolling the words inside his head. “I guess what I wanted to know was, how much control do you want to give him, and do you think giving him more control would feel even better?”
Hell if I knew.
“Um, I don’t…”
I was back to not knowing what to say. In my fantasies, giving my imaginary Dom additional control always made everything more erotic. When my imaginary Dom had faded and Dare had taken his place, that hadn’t changed.
I didn’t know how that would translate into the real world, though. “Maybe?”
My indecision didn’t frustrate Ryan. He chuckled and stilled for a moment before he lifted his hand off my neck and ran it over my head in a loving caress. That was a clear enough hint that I didn’t shy away from his touch when it went back to my neck.
I made a soft sighing sound and closed my eyes as he started the slow strokes again. Ryan made a quiet noise that radiated pleasure. What made him happy? My admitting how much I liked his touch? Something else entirely?
I hated not knowing. But I knew I’d rather live with the unknown than ask a stupid question that chased him away, even for a few moments.
“I don’t think he’d mind taking more control.” Ryan seemed to understand I wasn’t just talking about Dare because as I peeked open my eyes, I saw him smiling
“Should we talk about it with him?” Ryan’s voice sounded eager.
I wasn’t so sure about that idea. Talking was hard when sales or money weren’t involved. “Text him, maybe?”
I wasn’t sure if that would be taking the easy way out or not, but it felt better. Ryan chuckled again. “Yeah, that’s what I meant.”
I sighed. “Once we text him, he’s going to bring it up in person.”
I glanced over again to see Ryan shrug. “At least we won’t be surprised. It’ll give us a chance to organize our thoughts.”
That was one way to look at it. “Okay.”
Hopefully by the time he brought it up again in conversation, I’d have figured out how to answer the question. Hell, I wasn’t even sure what the options were. How much control would Dare want? How much would make him happy, and how much would just be frustrating? Once he had the control, would he make me wait for more or would he want to jump right off the deep end?
I was hoping he’d want to jump right off.
What we’d done after my date with Ryan had been incredible, but there was so much more I wanted. The careful touches and slow caresses had only made me more curious about bottoming. It’d never felt right to approach the subject with anyone else, but with Ryan and Dare it was different.
They made everything different.
“Do you think it would be…weird if he had different levels of control over both of us?” Ryan’s mind had to be going a thousand miles an hour for that question to have come out so easily.
“Um…” I only had to think about it for a moment. “No.”
He waited a moment, looking at me expectantly, then grinned. “Why not?”
If Ryan wanted to talk, why did that mean I had to talk too? He could just ramble on and I’d listen. “Um…We’re different people?”
That made sense, didn’t it?
Ryan smiled again. “Yep. No clones here.”
The look on his face said he wasn’t frustrated, but I could tell he needed more. Reassurance, maybe? “There are an infinite number of variations on a BDSM lifestyle. Ours won’t look like anyone else’s, and not just because there are three of us. Dare’s and mine won’t look like yours and his, and ours won’t look the same either.”
Ryan’s smile widened. “You’re quoting again.”
I liked information. There was nothing wrong with that. “Yes.”
Then he cocked his head and gave me a curious look. “Ours?”
“Huh?” I wasn’t sure what he meant.
“You listed off the BDSM relationships we’d have, and you included us in one.” He said that like it was significant, but I still didn’t get it.
“Yes.” It was hard to talk with him looking at me, so I went back to focusing on the stats that were flashing across the screen. It wasn’t as good as texting, but it was better than watching Ryan while I talked. “You and I will end up…doing stuff. If we both like domination and submission, I think that will end up coming across in our relationship with each other as well as with our relationship with Dare.”
Would we be vanilla together but only kinky with Dare?
That’d probably work, but I had a hard time picturing it. But there were still a lot of things I had a hard time picturing, so I wasn’t really worried. Ryan and I would work it out. We hadn’t come this far this fast to be stumped by something vanilla.
When Ryan stayed quiet a little too long, I finally gave in and turned my head just enough that I could see him out of the corner of my eye. He was watching me like he’d never seen me before. It was weird.
“What?” It might have come out a bit more defensively than I’d intended, but again, Ryan just smiled.
“I hadn’t thought about it that way.”
Duh. That was obvious.
He didn’t sound like the idea bothered him, so I stopped pretending to follow the program and turned back to Ryan. “And?”
He was making me nervous.
“And I like it.” He licked his lips, and as he shifted, it felt like his entire body got closer to mine even though I wasn’t sure he actually moved. “And I like you too.”
Then he finally leaned in and pressed his lips to mine.
As his boys grow more confident, Dare couldn’t be prouder of them.
Each step they take brings them all closer together and gives Dare glimpses of the family they’ll become. They just have a few hurdles to get over first, but Dare isn’t worried. He’s seen the way they look at him and each other. That much love and tenderness means nothing can stand in their way.
As their relationship deepens, Scott and Ryan find out more about themselves and discover new questions to answer.
Relying on Dare to give them the push they need might not be the best idea, but they can’t help looking to him for guidance as they figure out who they really are. As their Dom, he’s the natural person to lead them through the start of their new relationship, but they both know eventually they’ll have to start opening up and let their Dom know exactly what they want…his love and control.