It was finally time. Maybe…hopefully… No, it was time. Coming home after work today, he’d known that today was the day. They’d been under the bed for the last week. And while Tim knew that hiding them was stupid—he lived alone, for god’s sake—he couldn’t help it.
When the package had arrived in the mail, he just hadn’t been able to deal with it. So in typical fashion, when he’d gotten stressed and freaked out, he’d pulled an ostrich and buried his head in the sand—or in this case, he’d buried the diapers under the bed.
Tim knew most people wouldn’t understand, but it’d taken all his courage just to finally order the single package of diapers. He hadn’t been sure he would even order them, much less do anything with them. He also knew it was stupid that at twenty-six he had never actually said the word out loud, either. That was one of the next steps.
He had a list of goals and steps. His goals were probably a stretch, but he’d designed his steps to be manageable—stressful, but manageable. The first step had been searching online and just looking around. That had taken weeks to work up to, even though he knew no one would see what he was doing on his own computer.
And he wasn’t stupid enough to look for “stuff” at work or on public computers.
That was how he had always thought about the things that he wanted…stuff. Hence, the next steps in his plan. The fact that he was on the fourth step gave him a sense of pride. The second had been deciding what to order, and the third had been buying something. He knew they were small steps, but he was proud of himself. He’d been thinking about this for so many years that most of the time, he’d never thought he would even get this far.
Tonight it was step four and five. He could do it. One step at a time, and if it was too much, then he would try another night. But he thought he could do it. It just felt right. Sitting down on the floor, he took a deep breath and began pulling out all the crazy junk from under the bed.
Hidden behind the flattened moving boxes and Christmas stuff was the package. With one final deep breath, he pulled it out, setting it gently on the middle of the bed. If anyone had been watching, they would have probably thought it was a bomb with the care he took.
Looking down at the plain brown box, he took a moment to get his heart rate under control. Just knowing what was in the box made it hard to breathe. “Don’t be stupid. You can do this. It’s only a box.”
Finally getting his racing heartbeat under control, Tim pulled at the tape and opened the box. Stuffed inside was something he had waited years for. His diapers. Reaching inside, Tim jumped and couldn’t help the squeak that escaped him as he heard a door slam down the hall. Crappy apartment with thin walls…shaking his head, he got himself under control again.
Pulling out the package of specially designed diapers, Tim set them on the bed and just stared. The packaging was a sunny mix of yellows and greens that advertised the quality and fit of the diapers. It looked like anything you would see on the baby aisle at the local grocery store. Unless you read the fine print, you would never know that it was for grown-up babies.
Opening the plastic carefully, he managed to pull out a single diaper and hold it in his shaking hands. It was softer than he’d imagined it would be, and the ducks on the front were even cuter than they’d looked online. Tim had never imaged that there were so many styles and designs.
It’d been easy to pick the ducks, though.
Tim had always had a thing for ducks. Tucked up high in his closet, he still had the first stuffed toy duck that he had gotten as a child. Running his hands over the soft cottony texture of the diaper, he heard the crinkle of the material and imagined, just for a moment, what it would be like to wear it.
His cock stirred even as his panic rose at the thought of stripping down and actually putting one on. But not yet. No, he wasn’t ready for that quite yet. However, he was more confident than he’d ever been that he would finally get to that point.
Setting the diaper down on the bed, Tim took a deep breath and cleared his throat. It took several deep breaths before he tried to say it, and even then, it only came out as a whisper. No, that was not good enough to complete step five. Trying several more times, he finally managed to say it in a clear, deep voice that he sometimes thought of—when he worked up the courage to play with himself to his favorite fantasy—as his big boy voice.
“Diaper. I want to wear a diaper. I am going to wear a diaper. The idea of wearing a diaper turns me on. There is nothing wrong with fantasizing about wearing a diaper.” Maybe if he could say it enough times, he would come to believe it.
Coming home after a long day working on a bitch of a construction job, Cade bypassed the living room and kitchen, heading straight to the bedroom. Stretching out on the couch with food and a beer sounded great, but he had to get the smell and grime off him first.
He didn’t mind smelling like hard work—but coming home smelling like a taco was making him crazy.
Cade was the foreman of a local construction company that specialized in commercial projects. Normally, he loved his job. The company he worked for was careful with the jobs they took and only promised what they knew they could deliver.
It wasn’t the apartments they were renovating that was the problem. No, the problem was the AC and venting from the Mexican restaurant next door. For days, he’d come home smelling like tacos—which was why the new owners of the complex wanted them renovated.
He started stripping out of his clothes the minute he shut the front door. Walking through the house, littering his clothes as he walked through, Cade was naked by the time he entered his small bedroom. Striding toward his bathroom, Cade stumbled when he heard talking coming from the next apartment.
“Damn walls are too thin,” he grumbled, although the little guy next door was a good neighbor in general. Quiet most of the time, he didn’t seem to be a big partier, and he didn’t appear to have a girlfriend or a boyfriend because the walls were so poorly constructed that Cade would have noticed any bedroom gymnastics going on over there.
In fact, Cade only knew his name because their mail had gotten mixed up a couple of times.
Cade probably wouldn’t have even known the apartment was rented if it weren’t for the mail mix-ups and the fact that the guy was completely his type. He was on the shorter side of average for a man, only about five foot seven or eight tops, with thick, short golden hair and big brown eyes that gave him an innocent, wide-eyed expression, making him look younger than he probably was.
His sexy neighbor also had a lean swimmer’s body that looked trim without being overly muscular. Passing him on the street you would never have thought twink, but when you put him next to Cade’s muscular, wide frame, he looked like one.
Exactly Cade’s type, small enough for him to find sexy but not so small he would worry about breaking the guy.
Cade generally tried to keep to himself and ignore anything that wasn’t his business—especially when it came to his neighbors. But when he heard something about wearing diapers coming from Tim’s apartment, he stopped.
Moving toward the shared bedroom wall, he couldn’t help but listen more closely to the words coming through. Tim didn’t have any kids, he was sure of that, and he didn’t hear anyone else next door. Was he on the phone? Cocking his head, Cade leaned toward the wall, hoping to hear more.
“Nosy SOB, you should know better.” He should, but he wasn’t going to worry about it now that his curiosity was piqued. Standing naked by the wall trying to eavesdrop on his neighbor made him feel more than just a little bit stupid, but when he finally understood what Tim was saying, he nearly stopped breathing.
“He wants what?” What did he say? It couldn’t be what Cade thought. “He wants to wear a diaper?”
Cade wasn’t naïve by any means. He’d played around on enough porn sites to have stumbled into weird shit before, but he had never met anyone in real life that was into anything kinky. Turning the idea over in his mind, Cade listened as Tim proceeded to give himself a pep talk about his diapers.
Smiling, Cade thought it was kinda cute as he heard the little guy talking about wanting to wear diapers and telling himself that it was okay. It sounded like Tim was still working up his nerve about the whole thing, because no one gave themselves a pep talk like that if they’d already taken the plunge and done it.
Making himself walk away from the wall, Cade tried to feel bad for being so nosy, but he couldn’t quite do it. In his mind, he kept hearing Tim talk about the diapers and what he wanted to do with them. Trying to process what he’d heard Tim say, Cade thought he should be more disgusted, but the only things he was really feeling were curiosity and pride.
He’d never thought about diapers and stuff like that. The few times he’d stumbled onto porn with anything like that, he’d thought it was odd…maybe slightly interesting…but in a stare-at-a-train-wreck kind of way, not like he found it erotic. Cade was proud of Tim in a weird way. Hearing the determination in Tim’s voice, Cade thought that he must have been working on accepting himself for a long time.
As Cade walked into the small bathroom, he found himself trying to picture what Tim might want to do with the diapers. Well, he knew what Tim wanted to do with the diapers. Shaking his head and laughing to himself, he turned on the shower and waited for it to heat up. Aside from the obvious, what was his fantasy?
What did Tim really want? Was it a private thing or did he want a Daddy?
Was he going to have to listen to Tim moan and call out to his Daddy every night? That would just be weird, right? Cade didn’t even realize he’d been playing with his cock until he had to reach up and adjust the heat in the shower. He chose to ignore the fact that his cock was already half hard, well on the way to painfully erect.
Stepping into the shower, Cade couldn’t help the moan that escaped as the scalding water beat at his sore muscles. Standing under the pounding spray, he let his muscles relax and the sweat and smells wash away.
His mind drifted back to Tim, and he didn’t push the thoughts away. Not one to delude himself, he could see he was no longer merely intellectually interested in Tim’s kinks. Reaching for the soap, Cade allowed his curiosity to drift into fantasy territory.
Cade could easily see Tim resting on the bed in nothing but a t-shirt and diaper. And a binkie, a little man would need a binkie when he was going to bed. Cade could easily picture curling up around Tim and having him use Cade’s cock as his own personal toy.
His fantasy changed as he pictured them on the couch watching TV. In his mind, Tim looked over at him with those innocent, big brown eyes and asked his Daddy if he could have his binkie. Cade imagined pulling out his cock and letting Tim curl up with his head on his Daddy’s lap, gently sucking on his cock.
Reaching down to his hard dick, Cade didn’t even pretend to be washing it. Letting his soap-slick hand move up and down his rigid length, Cade couldn’t help the moan that escaped as the pleasure rushed through his body.
Picturing Tim curled up on his side looking innocent and sweet, with his diaper peeking out of his clothes, was more erotic than Cade thought it should be. Part of him thought he shouldn’t be finding the images so erotic, but a bigger part of him didn’t care.
He hadn’t run from the idea of being gay, so why would he run from a fantasy that turned him on like never before?
With the water cascading over him, caressing his every muscle, Cade leaned against the wall. He tilted his head back and tightened the grip on his cock. Closing his eyes, he let himself drift deeper into his fantasy. Running his hand up and down his shaft, he pictured Tim lying on the couch, head in Cade’s lap, licking his hard cock and gently sucking on it.
Fisting his dick even tighter, Cade could easily picture those innocent eyes looking up at him as Tim wrapped his soft hands around his Daddy’s cock and continued to caress his slit and wide head with his soft pink tongue and lips.
Cade used his thumb to stroke the sensitive head of his cock as he fucked his fist, hips thrusting faster and faster as he easily imagined it to be Tim’s tongue. Flicking his thumb softly over the slit and wide mushroom head, Cade felt the tingling in his balls that signaled his nearing release.
Tightening his grip on his dick, Cade could imagine the sounds Tim would make. The little moans and sighs that would escape him as Tim licked and sucked on his Daddy. The way he would wiggle and whimper as his own cock grew hard in his diaper waiting for his Daddy to touch him.
Cade exploded, cum shooting out into the shower as he pictured Tim lapping it up, his own hard cock trapped in the cottony diaper. Cade bucked against the wall as his orgasm washed over him, racing through his body like nothing before.
Slumping back against the wall, Cade fought to get his labored breathing and racing heart under control. Feeling like he’d run a marathon at a full-out sprint, he couldn’t help but feel confused. Was there something he had missed about himself? He’d always prided himself on being truthful—especially to himself.
He had never hidden in the closet and never from something that he wanted.
Looking back, he couldn’t help but feel disappointed in himself. Had he run from something that turned him on just because it wasn’t something that he had considered normal? The irony wasn’t lost on him. A gay man hiding from something because it wasn’t considered normal.
Shaking his head, he vowed never again.
Tim has a secret. A secret, naughty fantasy that he’s never told anyone because it’s one that most people wouldn’t understand. However, when his sexy neighbor accidentally learns his deepest fantasy, he won’t be able to hide from his desire any longer.
Story Contains: M/m sexual content, age play, diapers, and ABDL themes