My Little Human Chapter 1


This was the weirdest munch ever.

Somehow it’d ended up being all straight people besides me and possibly one other exception…an interesting one.

“Your innocent attire and the way your body reacts to youthful educational stimuli suggests you would be classified as a little.” His voice was almost mesmerizing and it took me a second to realize I had no idea what the tall alien had said.

Huh? Innocent attire?

His sentence or question, or fuck, string of words had me looking down at what I was wearing because at that moment I had no idea what I’d put on.

Okay, I was starting to see what he meant.

I was definitely wearing more clothes than any of the other subs in the room and the He-Man T-shirt I had on wasn’t the most grown-up item of clothing I possessed…but it was vintage. That made it cool. But I could see what the guy…man…alien had picked up on.


“Yes, I’m a little.” That was what he’d wanted to know, right?

What else had he said? Oh, the toys.

The bookstore where the munch was being held was owned by a woman in the lifestyle, and she was little too, so there were toys tucked everywhere. Most of the customers saw it as her being family-friendly, and it was, but it was also her way of having fun at work.

“And, um…”

How was I supposed to respond to that?

Had it even been a question?

Was honesty really the best policy with these guys?

Fuck it all.

Dropping my voice lower so the humans milling around the space probably wouldn’t hear, I took the advice I’d heard somewhere and told him what I was thinking. “The toys are more fun than the conversation. I thought there would be more Daddies here, but I’m the only not-straight person. It’s awkward.”

Everyone was really nice, but it was like they were all wondering what I was doing there. Even after Amy had bounced around introducing me to people as her friend and work neighbor, they’d still found it weird.

She didn’t seem to have realized that she only knew straight people and no one looked like they wanted to be the one to tell her that.

Not that I was going to be the one to do it either, so I probably shouldn’t judge.

Well, yeah, I was going to judge.

But I’d do it quietly.

The rather large alien guy shook his head, and it was such a human gesture, I smiled. It didn’t look like something his head would do naturally, but it was cute.

But he went from cute to confusing in a flash. “I should be sorry there are not more individuals for you to interact with romantically in a control-based relationship; however, I am not.”


He was really the only person who’d taken the time to talk to me, so I wasn’t going to chase him off, but I had no idea what his point was.

What I knew about these guys would fit on an index card, but one of those facts was that they weren’t mean or rude. So…I finally decided just to fuck it and ask. It wasn’t like he’d find it weird. “Why are you not sorry?”

He took it as logically as I thought he would. “In social interactions with humans, often the default conversational and romantic preference is for other humans. It makes declaring interest difficult. The lack of competition will increase my odds of success significantly.”


That hadn’t gone like I’d thought it would.


Declaring interest?

Better odds?

Oh, dude, the alien liked me.


“I have no idea how to respond to that but it’s nice to meet you.” To another human that would’ve been too blunt for them to handle, but my new friend the alien nodded.

“I am very pleased to make your acquaintance. I have been eager to make the acquaintance of more human submissives with the moniker of little.” He gestured toward the far corner that was filled with beanbags and toys on a low shelf. “Would you like to sit and discuss your preferences for partners in a control-based relationship?”

Did I want to sit down and talk about what I wanted in a Daddy?

Yep, weirdest munch ever.

But he was the only guy to have talked to me so far besides the one Dom who’d asked if I knew where the bathroom was, so I figured it couldn’t hurt.

“Do you understand what a little would be looking for in a relationship?” The control-based comment said he at least understood the basics of BDSM, and somehow he’d ended up at a lifestyle meet-and-greet, so he had to get at least some of it.


Again, my new friend didn’t appear to be offended. “In my research, I have come to understand that the domination-based title for my position would be Daddy and I would be required to provide comfort, structure, and playtime for a submissive human who would be defined as a little.”

Okay, so he did know what I wanted.

This kept getting weirder and weirder.

“Good.” Now what? Oh, he’d asked if I wanted to sit down. “Yes, I’d like to sit down and get to know you.”

It couldn’t hurt, right?

He seemed nice and they were all super rule followers. He understood I was a little and I’d made sure he knew I wasn’t straight. Oh, did he know what that meant? He’d said he’d be a Daddy in a relationship with a little. Had he actually said he liked men?

I was starting to wish my notecard’s worth of information had been a bit bigger.

One tentacle loosely looped around my back to lead me over to the sitting area, but he was careful to keep his touch light. It was all very old-school polite and kind of cute. He even studied me carefully as I sat down on the beanbag like he was making sure I couldn’t hurt myself.

Very gentlemanly.

However, watching him curl his tentacles around the base of his torso as he lowered himself to the floor made it clear he wasn’t human, not that I was sure it mattered in this case. But that would probably depend on what he wanted from me.

“Does the arrangement of my body bother you?” Before I could answer, he kept going. “Human reactions to our physiology have been…curious.”

Oh, I bet they had been.

“We’re weird and rude sometimes. Sorry.” It took my brain a second to jump back to the original question. “No, your tentacles don’t bother me. Was that the question?”

He was so distracting it was hard to keep track of what he’d asked.

“Yes, that was the question I felt was of the utmost importance to clarify first.” He lifted a smaller one and held it out toward me with what I thought was a touch it gesture. “Have you interacted socially with a member of my species before?”

It seemed to be a have you dated someone like me kind of question, so I shook my head. “No, I own a small craft store down the block. You guys aren’t big on crafting, so it’s mostly just been saying hi in places like the grocery store.”

One of my neighbors around the block might’ve been his species, but the guy seemed to work crazy hours or only came around once in a while because I hadn’t seen him more than a few times.

“Humans have fascinating hobbies.” That seemed to be some kind of approval and I found myself smiling as he inched his limb closer. “Making sure you don’t find my touch…troubling will be the next step in discovering compatibility. Please do not worry, I am not slimy.”

Something about the way he said it made it clear there was a story behind it.

“You look soft, not slimy.” I wasn’t sure I should be randomly touching him.

That was…rude, maybe?

Weird, definitely.

It wasn’t the tentacles, though. I wasn’t sure I would’ve been stroking a human Daddy’s hand the first time he introduced himself either. But he did look soft. And he wanted to make sure I didn’t find him slimy or yucky.

Before I could decide what to do, because this had never happened to me before, he smiled and changed tactics. He was silly. He reached out and grabbed a big stuffed octopus off the shelf. “This looks very soft as well.”

He wasn’t sneaky at all, but I found myself reaching out and taking the toy from his limb. Accidentally touching him as I took the toy, my fingers caressed over the tip. Oops. But I wasn’t testing him out like he was some sort of sea monster. It was an accident.

And I’d accidentally found out he really was soft.

“Amy has lots of toys all over. I like coming in here on my lunch break sometimes.” It was fun and she was nice. She’d been nice even before she’d figured out I was little too. “I have crayons and stuff like that, but not toys.”

I’d end up getting too distracted.

“Do you enjoy coloring, little human?” His question had me wondering if he thought I was short or if it was because I technically was a human who was a little.

“Yes.” The way he was giving me his undivided attention made telling him more about what I liked easier. “I have the special grown-up coloring books at work and I use the fancy colored pencils to help people see how much fun it is. But at home, I have fun ones.”

Holding out my shirt with my free hand and tucking the octopus against my side, I smiled. “Like He-Man.”

My new friend was nodding and looking very serious as he studied my shirt. “The character on your clothing looks as if it would be very fun to apply color to.”

He was so cute.

“Thank you.” Was that the right response? I wasn’t sure, but it made him smile again, so I didn’t worry about it. “What do you do?”

I probably should’ve started by asking his name, but he hadn’t asked mine, so I decided it didn’t matter.

“I work in aerospace engineering.” He said it like he was a dentist or something. “I have a familiarity with space.”


“That sounds fun.” It actually sounded stressful, but that didn’t seem like the right way to respond. “I’m glad you found something to do when you moved here.”

Hmm, that didn’t sound any better.

“Yes, it was an adjustment.” He shrugged and the wavy way his body moved had me wanting to touch him. Thankfully, he continued and I assumed he couldn’t tell how much I wanted to climb all over him.

He was like a big smooth jungle gym that moved.

“I enrolled in a university program. That helped me to understand how humans saw the mechanics of flight.” He shook his head like it was ridiculous. “Before something can be fixed, one must understand the flaws in its logic.”

Laughing would’ve been the wrong response, right?

“That sounds logical.” He had to learn where we’d fucked up before he could fix it. “You enjoy what you do now, though?”

His beaming smile and the pleased way he puffed up said that was a good assumption. “Yes, I find it very fulfilling.”

“That’s good.” I wouldn’t claim to be the best in social situations, but this was so new, I wasn’t sure if we were going to continue the small talk or not.

Gesturing toward the other side of the store where most of the people were hanging out, I jumped in with a slightly random question. “How did you find the group?”

“I have been in the store several times for reading material. The proprietor, Amy, did not mind answering questions about her relationship with the human male she calls Daddy.” Something about the look on his face and the way he didn’t say Ralph’s name said he didn’t like him either.

We seemed to have a lot in common.

“She’s nice.” I wasn’t going to admit what I thought of Ralph while we were in the store, but the way my new friend was studying me said he’d figured it out.

Hmm, hadn’t someone come into the store and mentioned that they could tell shit about us just by smells and heartbeats?

Was I thinking really loud?

Smelling like Ralph was a dickhead?

“She is exceedingly polite.” The almost neutral tone in his voice didn’t help me figure out what he thought of her beyond that. Did he like women? Did he not like women? Did he think she was cute?

Nodding, I tried to figure out how to ask any of that without sounding awkward at the very least. There didn’t seem to be a way.

Fuck it.

“Do you like male subs?” Yep, this whole friendship was going to be based around one awkward question after another.

“I do not have enough familiarity with intimate human social interactions to accurately answer that question without risking offense.” He shrugged as I tried to wrap my brain around that sentence. “I can very clearly state that I am looking to be a Daddy to a human little and I find no issue with your form or gender.”


“Okay.” What had he said? “I’ll do my best not to be offended by anything you tell me as long as you’re not mean about it.”

And as long as he said it more simply.

I wasn’t stupid, but he made me think way too hard sometimes.

“I’m glad you don’t have an issue with my form.” Keeping my voice low made me feel less stupid about that sentence, but I was pretty sure no one else could’ve heard us anyway. Most of the group seemed to be discussing different types of impact play, and I’d rather be talking about crayons versus markers.

My new friend didn’t think it was silly, though. He perked up. “Thank you, little human.”

“You’re welcome.” Now what? “Okay, another human would think this is too blunt and would call me rude, but I’m going to ask it anyway. What are we doing here?”

There were a few other female littles running around and I was pretty sure at least one was single, but he’d zeroed in on me, so…

My new friend cocked his head and his limbs went very still, but nothing made him seem upset, so I waited while he thought about the question. “I approve of highly direct questions and conversations. We do not consider it to be rude. Dancing around the topic, as humans might say, is much harder and not something we excel at.”

It was his turn to wait for me to think again and he seemed relieved when I nodded. “Thank you for letting me know. I’ll remember that.”

So…now what?

Weirdest munch ever…but that might not be a bad thing.

Want to read the rest?

Weirdest munch ever.

Dane isn’t expecting much from the mostly straight munch he’s somehow ended up at. As awkward encounters turn into a boring meet-and-greet, he’s ready to escape when the most interesting Daddy in the room sets eyes and tentacles on him.

When an earnest new Daddy and a slightly confused little come together, sparks and laughter fly because tentacle Daddies make the best Daddies.

Author's Note:

This story was originally a novella included in the Dirty Daddies Spring Anthology and has been extended by 30k words in length.

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